1. Food > dating
That obsessive, determined energy that would normally be focused on dating and relationships becomes almost entirely directed towards food. Eating becomes a serious sport — revered and approached with a Sochi-level intensity. A friend’s birthday at my high school was no joke — brownie bake-offs were a real and serious business.
2. Uniforms break you, then become a part of you
After initial resistance, you soon embark upon a clingy, codependent relationship with your uniform. It’s just so simple! No more fashion decisions necessary, ever! It eventually becomes such a crutch that when Free Dress Day rolls around, you stand paralyzed in front of your closet for a half hour, then breathe a sigh of relief when you realize that “Free Dress Day” technically means you can wear whatever you want, including your uniform. You put it on, chuckling at your earlier attempts to dress yourself…
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